Training Day 92 - Back to Work

Language: Today's vocab quiz was my worst one yet. I'm not sure why. It just didn't click this morning... But I redeemed myself with my military topics scores. I scored a 100 on my second test and I'm confident I destroyed the make-up quiz I had today. What more, I acquired five of the unit books I need to make the semester 3 vocab lists for BYKI and have a pretty good idea on how to get audio support. The project also went up another link on the chain of command and now there is talk about my receiving a commandant's coin or the like for my efforts. That should be a nice counter to the page 11 in my book for rolling back.

Military: Rumor has it I am in line to be a fire team leader...

Medical: I met with the podiatrist today. We both agreed that medical over-reacted in sending me to him. However, he did take care of my problems. What more, he's a marathon runner and a former soldier so we had a good conversation. It amazes me how open marathon runners are. This is the second total stranger asking me to call with any questions I have.

Personal: So... Some things clicked in my head today.

With everything I have gone through there is but one constant: My own burning desire to do better. The desire to better myself is one of the primary drives that gets me through the day and doing what it is I need to do. It has seen me through some pretty shaky times.

I realized that, with the end of this relationship, there is only one thing left to do: Charge forward. All that time, energy, and resources that I was pouring into a relationship that was ultimately going nowhere has been freed up to be reassigned where it matters. That is what I am going to do. I am going to work on myself. I'm already wiser for the experience... Now I can make sure that I am smarter, stronger, faster, more skilled... Every time a relationship ends, I am compelled to improve myself over who I was during the relationship. It all stacks too.

The other constant with my relationships is that each one is better than the ones before it. It's funny because during the relationship people tell me that I can find someone better but I don't believe them. Once the relationship is over, I can look back and say, "Yes. Definitely." This is the same. I've stopped caring about this past relationship and have started looking forward to the next one.

If I am a better person each time I go through this... If I meet and care for a better person (one day finding a true lady)... What is there to regret? Nothing. What is there to pine for? Nothing. At least, not in the past. And all I can do for the future is prepare for it, which is what I am doing. I will be worthy of my lady. I refuse to stagnate. I refuse to slide backward. It is time to move forward.

So... If I am a better person and if my lady is a better person than those I've left behind... Who loses here?

Certainly not me.